Voulez vous

A blurry view from the PCH

Don’t wake up until 11:30am. Nice life, Lindsay. Drive to Chase to switch over from TD Bank. I didn’t think I would care but now that I’m here it’s actually a little sad. TD was good to me. I’ll miss him.

Back at home the boys are playing madden. The sound doesn’t work so the three of them are sitting in silence playing a video game. It’s awkward. I scarf down a bagel with cream cheese and tomato, then back on the road to find a job. Malibu today, which means I get to drive down the Pacific Coast Highway. If you ever visit California this is the road people say you HAVE to drive on. It is quite a view. I make it to the Malibu Inn in a little over an hour. They “might” be hiring. I fill out an extensive application that asks stupid questions like, “Who is the most important person in the restaurant?” Gee, I don’t know. I’m gonna take a guess and say the customer.

Back to Venice to check out bars on Abbot Kinney Blvd. There’s a French place called Lilly’s. I took French from 7th grade to 11th grade. We could pick Spanish, Latin, or French. Spanish is stupid, Latin is a dead language, and French is pretty. I’m an idiot. I’m in 7th grade. Don’t ask me what I want to learn; tell me what I should learn. Everyone should learn Spanish – it’s the universal language. Latin is the root of all languages – great for grammar, word choice, and English in general. Nope, I’m taking French. I liked it, but it was really hard. The only thing I was good at was reading out loud in class. Maybe didn’t know what I was saying, but I had some damn good pronunciation. Also got to read and listen to two broadway shows – The Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables. At the end of the marking period we took a class trip to New York City. Phantom was the first broadway show I saw and it was also my first time in the city. I fell in love with both.

I wait for the manager and take in the place. A table of ladies close by are all speaking French. The nice hostess who helped me is now on the phone speaking French. Another staffer gets the attention of the bartender – in French. I’m noticing a trend here. I approach the hostess stand. So, is it a requirement to speak French here? She laughs. “No, that would be a lot to ask.” It certainly doesn’t seem like it. Finally, the bartender approaches me. Oh, I’m just waiting for the manager. Big smile on his face. He is the manager. He’s like a French cartoon character. Very bubbly and Frenchy and happy. He pauses to tell the waitress some menu changes for the evening. It’s a long list. He finally looks back at me and just smiles that big French smile. “Are you walking?” No, I drove here. “No, are you walking now?” Oh yea, I’m walking around. Finally realize he’s asking if I’m working now. Oh no no no, I just moved here, I don’t have a job yet. “We might need a bartender. I’ll look over this and call you tomorrow.” On Thanksgiving. Another big smile. OK, great. And what’s your name? Something French with a rolling R sound. Sorry, what is it? He says is it again. I try to repeat it, kind of, surely butchering it. This is embarrassing. I get out fast.

Next stop, Joe’s Restaurant. “Manager isn’t in, but we might be hiring a server, actually. Come back Friday.” Count on it. I go to a couple more, then onward to an audition. Not really. There’s the Christmas Hollywood Parade on Sunday. Saw a post on Craigslist to be a “Cool Cat” girl. Apparently, Cool Cat is a children’s book cartoon character. He’ll be at the parade, and they need two girls to ride along with him, smiling a lot, and handing out pamphlets. $75 for about 4 hours or so. I’ll take anything at this point. I go. They mic me up and put me on camera. They’re making a documentary about the whole thing. Basically just ask me about myself and then, “Why should you be a Cool Cat girl?” I could care less, I just need some cash.

I’m spent. Head home. The boys look exactly as I left them. I offer to drive them out since it’s Thanksgiving Eve and they’ve been home all day. They act like they’re going to do something but never do. I stay up late drinking wine, blogging, and listening to Christmas music.


3 thoughts on “Voulez vous

  1. Laughed out loud, no I drove here! Lol
    I remember the French teachers room (was my homeroom) she hated me, of course, and thought I was an idiot. Especially when I saw the poster in her room for les miserables and pronounced it as it’s spelled: less miserable-s

  2. lol this whole thing made me think of kelly a lot. cant believe you said i drove, i def laughed out loud at this. oh and thanks for helping me pass 4 years of french. i copied off of you. i hope you get to be in the parade!

  3. hahaha lauren and kelly i love all of your comments. Kel i can just picture you saying that. Laur you might have copied off me but i was probably cheating off Lauren Cavicchia or Katie Herbst.

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